ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
