absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
