YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
