She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
