my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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