Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize