At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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