so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Pooping to opera.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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