i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
just tell him i said nine months
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
