just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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