I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
