So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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