i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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