I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Randomize
