they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
