Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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