Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
