i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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