i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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