Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
