It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
