Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
