Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Drunk is a universal language darling
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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