Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you inspire me to be a worse person
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
