she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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