Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
