this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
