Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.

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(912): View more from Georgia

i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS

(1-912): View more from Georgia

dude...come out of the closet already

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(480): View more from Arizona

I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE

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(703): View more from Virginia

I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.

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(518): View more from New York

I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut

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(469): View more from Texas

I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.

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(515): View more from Iowa

Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.

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