I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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