just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
