why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
