Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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