I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
