what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
