Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
