ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
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