ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
