she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
