? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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