you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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