All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
