I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
