Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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