i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
