I'm jealous of your bromance
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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