I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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