maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize