My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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