i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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