should my penis look like a turkey
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
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